Supporting Bisexual Clients in Therapy: Creating Inclusive and Affirming Spaces

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Written By Ana Flores

Bi Visibility Day is celebrated every year on the 23rd of September — a day dedicated to recognising and raising awareness about bisexuality, as well as addressing the challenges and misconceptions that bisexual individuals face. As a therapist, it’s important to acknowledge the significance of this day and reflect on how therapy can support bisexual clients in navigating their unique experiences.

What is Bi Visibility Day?

Bi Visibility Day was first celebrated in 1999. It was created to give bisexual people, who are often underrepresented or misunderstood, a platform to share their experiences and celebrate their identity. Despite making up a significant portion of the LGBTQ+ community, bisexual individuals can face a unique form of marginalisation — both from the broader society and sometimes even within LGBTQ+ spaces.

Bi erasure: Why Visibility Matters

Visibility is crucial in breaking down harmful stereotypes, particularly for bisexual people, who are often overlooked or misunderstood within the LGBTQ+ community. Their experiences are frequently assumed to mirror those of lesbian or gay individuals, but bisexuality comes with unique challenges. Bisexual people are often erased or invalidated, with assumptions that they are ‘confused’, ‘experimenting’, that their orientation is ‘just a phase’ based on who they’re currently dating, or worse, that their sexual orientation doesn’t exist. This type of erasure, called bi erasure, can be deeply harmful, contributing to feelings of isolation, self-doubt, invalidation and shame.

Bisexual individuals often experience marginalisation both from wider society and the LGBTQ+ community itself. In the broader society, bisexuality is still viewed as threatening due to its same-sex element, while some members of the LGBTQ+ community perceive bisexual people as retaining certain privileges associated with heterosexuality. This can lead to harmful stereotypes, where bisexual people are labelled as ‘not queer enough’, ‘promiscuous’, or more likely to cheat. As a result, they may feel pressure to ‘prove’ their sexuality and can often feel unwelcome in LGBTQ+ spaces. These experiences of exclusion and invalidation can lead to significant emotional distress and feelings of being caught between two worlds.

Unsurprisingly, bisexual individuals report higher levels of anxiety and depression, and lower levels of happiness and life satisfaction, compared to their lesbian, gay, and straight counterparts. These mental health disparities are even more pronounced for those with additional marginalised identities, such as bi people of colour, bi trans individuals, or bi disabled people. The compounded impact of intersecting identities can make it even more challenging for them to access support and feel accepted, both within the LGBTQ+ community and in wider society.

self-acceptance, self-esteem, being seen

How Therapy Can Support Bisexual Clients

Counselling and psychotherapy services for LGBTQ+ people have evolved against a historical background of medical and psychological pathologisation of homosexuality over the past 130 years. LGBTQ+ individuals have often been subjected to discrimination, misunderstanding, and mistreatment within therapeutic settings. As a result, many may feel reluctant or fearful to seek help, worrying that their identities will be seen as something to ‘fix’ rather than accepted and celebrated. This historical context highlights the vital importance of creating a safe, non-judgmental, and affirming therapeutic space, where LGBTQ+ clients can feel seen, understood, and supported on their journey toward healing and self-acceptance.

For bisexual individuals in particular, therapy can be a critical space for exploring their identity, confronting feelings of isolation, and addressing the mental health impacts of bi-erasure and discrimination. Therapy offers a safe space where bisexual clients can:

  • Explore their identity: External and internalised biphobia can lead to confusion, self-doubt, or a lack of self-acceptance. Therapy provides a space for bisexual individuals to process these experiences, affirm their identity, and build self-esteem and self-confidence.

  • Experience validation: Validating a client’s sexual identity is a powerful act. It can help clients feel accepted for who they are, paving the way for them to accept themselves fully. Affirmation helps to counter the damage caused by bi-erasure and societal messages.

  • Address biphobia and oppression: Therapy allows clients to work through experiences of discrimination without positioning their sexual orientation as the source of their difficulties. It offers a space to resist the narrative that their bisexuality is the ‘problem’.

  • Address the impact of bi-erasure: Experiences of being misunderstood or feeling invisible can be emotionally taxing. Therapy can help clients articulate these experiences, feel acknowledged and seen.

  • Deconstruct internalised stereotypes: Bisexual individuals may have internalised harmful stereotypes that lead to shame or guilt. Therapy can help clients unlearn these damaging beliefs and provide space to create a healthier relationship with different parts of themselves.

  • Release emotions: Therapy offers a space for clients to process difficult feelings like shame, guilt, and anger, helping them to release these emotions in a healthy way and work toward healing.

  • Discuss relationship dynamics: Bisexual individuals may face specific challenges in their relationships, including pressures to conform to heterosexual relationship norms or misconceptions about their sexual orientation. Therapy can provide a space to navigate open communication, set boundaries, and foster mutual respect, allowing for more authentic and fulfilling relationships.

  • Work through trauma and mental health challenges: Experiences of discrimination, harassment, and invisibility can lead to anxiety, depression, or other mental health concerns. Therapy supports clients navigate these challenges, helping them process trauma and build resilience.

It is crucial to recognise that bisexual individuals, like anyone else, don’t come to therapy solely to address issues related to their sexuality. Being bisexual is just one facet of their identity and may not be central to their presenting concerns. They may seek therapy for a wide range of reasons, including stress, anxiety, relationship issues, or major life transitions. Approaching clients as whole, complex individuals allows for more effective and meaningful therapeutic work, rather than assuming that all their challenges stem from their sexual orientation.

Conclusion

On Bi Visibility Day, we celebrate the beauty, complexity, and diversity of bisexuality. For therapists, it is a reminder of the importance of creating an inclusive and supportive space where bisexual clients can feel seen, heard, and valued. By acknowledging their unique experiences and advocating for their visibility, we help foster a more compassionate, accepting world where bisexual individuals can thrive.

If you or someone you know would like to explore issues related to bisexuality or sexual identity in a supportive and affirming space, please don’t hesitate to reach out. You deserve to be seen and supported on your journey.

Help and Resources

References:

Ana Flores
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